“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night.”
If you have lost someone you loved recently, adjusting to life without them here can be really difficult. And whilst the process of grief is perfectly normal, it can manifest in unexpected ways. It can lead you to question life, it’s purpose, your routines, beliefs and everyday life can take a knock. Our everyday activities can be difficult too.
Everyone experiences grief and loss differently and there really is no right or wrong way to feel. Some people get angry, some refuse to believe it’s happened, some withdraw from friends and family, whilst some appear completely numb. The loss of a loved one, friend or family member can trigger difficulties such as depression and if you are finding it hard to come to terms with their passing, you may experience both physical and psychological symptoms too.
You are not alone. There is support available.
No amount of talking is going to bring your loved one back, but bereavement therapy is a very special type of counselling. It’s here to help you through, by exploring your thoughts, feelings and emotions - in a safe and nurturing space. Whatever you’re feeling, whether that be shock, guilt, numbness, anxiety, anger, sadness or frustration, this too will pass.
These difficult feelings can last for days, weeks, months or even years in some cases. Counselling really can help.
Every day I see clients in clinic and most days I help people affected by grief and loss. So, I see that people can feel better by accessing therapy, following the loss of someone they love.
Turning to counselling, following the loss of a loved one, is not a sign of weakness but instead an admission of strength - seeking help at a time when it’s really needed.
Specialist Bereavement counselling & psychotherapy, in Nuneaton & Hinckley
Stages of bereavement
There are many different theories regarding grief cycles. I work with a few and can help you through each of the stages, whichever you relate to.
It’s important that we find ways to mourn our loss and express our grief.
Whilst it’s a confusing time involving lots of powerful emotions, these feelings and emotions will pass with time. They may grow, dissipate or even shift as we go through each stage of the cycle. However, not everyone will experience it in the same order, at the same time or for the same length of time.
It is usually true though that most people will go the following stages:
Accepting that your loss has really happened
Experiencing the powerful emotions and pain that comes with grief
Trying to adjust to life without the person who has died
Putting less emotional energy into your grief, finding a new place to put it
What experience do I have?
For many years, I have worked with women, men, adolescents, young adults and couples in a wide range of settings, including: community mental health charities, local cancer charities, private rehab centres and local children's services. In this time I’ve specialised in the field of bereavement and loss. When starting my therapy training, I worked for Coping with Cancer and Macmillan Cancer Support. As you can imagine, in these settings I seen a lot of people that were affected by bereavement. It was here that I began to see the true impact of grief. For many, home, work and social life were torn apart. Those left behind questioned what had just happened, what life ahead looked like and how they should act or feel.
During my training at University, I chose to focus my dissertations and case studies on bereavement and grief cycles.
In recent years I’ve spent a large portion of my career supporting clients affected by grief. Helping them seek acceptance whilst coming to terms with their loss.